We were allowed to hold the girls last night for the first time! Because they are on different schedules, we held Lexa about 8:30 p.m. and had to wait to hold Geneva until her 11:30 p.m. feeding. Lexa, although smaller and more fragile, is much more accepting of touch and stimulation. Geneva is very jumpy and startles easily. Not playing favorites, but we were so tired after holding Geneva that we haven't uploaded the photos yet. So we will concentrate on Lexa for this post. And there is awesome video of the moment, too that I couldn't figure out how to load yet. Wow! What an incredible feeling to hold my baby Lexa. She is a fighter. She is having some trouble feeding--with reflux and digestion but keeps her spirits high. She came right to my arms, and I said "Hi Lexa. I'm your mommy." At that moment she opened her beautiful blue eyes and just stared at me! Of course I was crying (happy tears). She just studied me and responded so well to my voice. Patrick said, "So you're the lady I've been hearing all these months." I kissed her over and over again and then let her daddy have a turn. It was so amazing. This morning, I visited the nursery by myself. The nurse was finishing a procedure with Lexa so I saw Geneva first. Lexa was crying (she has a very weak cry kind of like a kitten) during the procedure and as soon as the nurse was finished, she let me go and comfort her. I walked over to her bed, leaned down and said "Mommy is here, Lexa." She IMMEDIATELY stopped crying, opened her eyes, and held out her little hand for me to grab. I grabbed her fingers and just talked to her to calm her. I then cried uncontrollably for 10 minutes with the nurse having to comfort me! It was the most surreal experience I have ever had. She literally was calmed by my touch & voice and just continued to study me for several minutes. I told her she was a brave girl and that although she started life small and fragile, she would overcome it soon enough. I told her of her namesake, Aunt Joy, and that she had extra blessings because of it. It really hit me at that moment that my babies are here and I can't take them home! I am okay now, just a rough morning. Pop (my dad) is on the way up to visit his new granddaughters and the nurse said he could hold Geneva this afternoon. Can't wait to see that moment, as they look alike! I'll keep posting...
3 comments:
Leslie and Patrick, We will keep praying for the girls and the two of you. We know from experience how hard it is to not be able to hold your baby when you want to...it's so tough! We will continue to pray that they get stronger and stronger! Can't wait to see them! :)
Please remember that I am here for you whenever you need a shoulder. It is so hard, I know but it will be over soon enough and your sweet little ones will be home in your arms to stay!
Les, I am anxious every night to see the new pictures and updates on Geneva and Lexa. They change so much day to day. Be brave later today (Friday, May 29) when you are discharged, as you'll be surprised how much there is left to do to get ready to bring them home, and for you to rest--and you are so close by. All things said, it'll still be hard, but they are so healthy. I CANNOT get your blog to accept me as a subscriber. Both of you take care of yourselves as you have a marathon coming when the girls are home. . . it's so amazing--nothing else will ever come close to the feelings you have for your children. Patrick, I'm sure the grils recognize your voice, too. My love, Karen G/Sheridan
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